An oasis of horror in a desert of bordedom.

I missed you today in a way I haven’t missed you in a long time. A deep longing, wailing, that I buried deep inside a well that I thought I had shuttered to last longer than this. It’s not the separation that scared me, not the intense desire. What scared me was how easily the fortifications crumbled. You passed through my best defense effortlessly as if you decided it was time for a bath and slipped just below the surface. 

I was listening to Never Cursed by Jonny Greenwood and this just kinda came out.

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It’s some kind of wailing. A song. A collection of voices,but there not just outside. They move freel through me. Flowing between every inch of bone and flesh. Touching every piece down to the core. Reaching something inside so deep. So untouchable that it moves you to tears. It’s not often that I  find myself here. Not often that something of this wind is blown my way. But, when it comes, it comes with a fierceness. Relentless force o nature. Seemingly endless supply of energy and emotion. Strong but flexible, easily moving to the path of least resistance. Carrying on with it s duty to fill the void. Fill the very thing you thought was unfillable. Something dark is now light. A heaviness lifted, replaced by the soft encouragement of the moan. A deep sigh exposing the tension that held it all together. Something so fluid. So un beatable, uncorrupt and pure. Honest and unwanting in its duty. It comes to life with purpose. It doesn’t ask anything more. Home. Warm but crisp. The part of you that wants to break just before the bend. One last moment a soft reflection of the night before. A glance left n your shoulder. Her hair slowly moving in its wake. Looking back you see it. Moving forward it’s gone. There is no time left. All is just left untold stories circling between the few willing to tell them. The places you swore youd never go. The things you said you would never do. The people there all waiting to see you. Standing around circled and gathered for this one moment. You enter without fear or expecting. They sit and stare and watch you as you move forward. The alter pure white. The water flowing from thabove. There is nothing left to do but sink.If only you could move. The heaviness returns the light fades as they catch there breath. A scab removed and flesh remains. The cool chill on it’s sour wet spot. Where does it go. Where do we pu tit away when we don’t have the time. When do we let it back out. How does the world march on knowing all it’s beauty. All it’s ephemeral glory shining through the void. It’s brevity encapsulated in amber. It’s tiny bit ofhope kept for those that wish to see it. The tiny bit of fear that follows the right decision. That moment of suspense before it falls. The flicker of pain, the lasting joy and deep fulfilment. Two sides of the same sword. That which cuts can also cure. The razors edge only a moment away from making the fall that much sweeter. Somethings. Somethings are as they should be. Somethings don’t happen for a reason. But all things move to there place. Write with grief. They sit and stare and wait and ponder and look to the stars. Waiting, patiently for that one last thing to come into the light. The one moment they felt they could escape. And get away. Not a life. Not a breath. Just a moment intime. Fluttering by bouncing in the wind the way that you float on the surface. Warm an happy . The smile to start a thousand wars and a giggle to end them. She sits waiting. Cast in her beauty, trapped by herself put away by the greed and selfish men that roam about. She has no way out but in. And one day shell find it. One day shell give it freely without asking for anything in return. Someday it will come spilling out. Falling faster than she can give. And we can only hope that it isn’t taken to quickly. The last thing they think of before th e fall is the face. The last thing they think of at the end is the face. The eyes staring back. The dark stones of blue and navy piercing through the veil, showing the light where none may show. The last breath of a thousands songs.